1. |
Option Anxieties
02:08
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So if time refuses to slow
And truth remains so untold
Where do I go from here?
If the answers never come
And I can’t assign meaning to all I’ve become
Does all of this loss remain so unresolved?
Do I die bitter and rueful that I’ve grown so old
Anguished as ever without any truth to behold?
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2. |
Last Flight
03:43
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Last I heard she was pinning teabags on the wall
Last I heard she hadn’t felt this way before
And in the summer sun, she’s bound to wither away
And when the damage is done, she’ll be left with the price to pay
Last I heard she was waiting tables by The Falls
Collecting her tips, saving up for another trip to Montreal
But soon the summer boys, will come to whisk her away
They’ll dismantle her youth and she’ll be left with the price to pay
And you told me that you were disgusted by your own desire
And that if you had had the chance to dance
You would have thrown yourself onto the fire
What happened to the girl I admired?
Now I’m told that she’s sending postcards to herself
Waiting by the mailbox, she’d be distraught to find a thought there from somebody else
But soon the summer boys, are bound to drop her a line
And form their dead end jobs, they will recount the sun drenched days of their prime
And you told me that you were disgusted by your own desire
And that if you had had the chance to dance
You would have thrown yourself onto the fire
What happened to the girl I admired?
What happened to the friend I admired?
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3. |
An Oversight
05:00
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Such an unfamiliar sight,
Your tears mixing with the ash on the pavement tonight
I guess the years caught up alright
And now the streets that you love refuse to hold what’s left of the night
And it’s an old lie
From a past life that you cant cast away
That keeps the old guard
Of a new world, reluctant in their appraise
Of you and your timid ways.
Such a staggering oversight
Fixing your face in the bathroom while you’re bleeding out
So what to does this all amount?
Will your violent ends meet violent delights?
And we’re the last strand
Of a grand plan that somehow faded away
But I’m a good friend,
At least I was then, but could you say the same
Of you and your crooked ways?
And now your dreams of winning the lottery
Are stronger than they’ve ever been
As you're pacing round the hallways of your parents house
Among squandered potential, HECS debt and doubt
When your sense of self is a potpourri
And you’re angrier than you've ever been
And the answers only ever seem to come in halves
So tell me did you lean on your youth to hard?
But you held, the keys and the reins for so very long.
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4. |
Method Acting
06:02
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They raise the curtain for you to see what lies behind
But you’re too busy to notice, you’re throwing darts up in the sky
I don’t know what you’re aiming for but I admire that you always try
You live your life so carelessly, I wish I could live it by your side
They call it method acting, but I call it living a lie
So go and take your mask off and deliver another aside
Cause you know all the dialogue, yes you’ve learnt all of your lines
And now I fear that all the words I hear have been rehearsed a thousand times
So go ahead, go and fuck everybody you know
It doesn’t matter to me, but don’t you think that it’s so strange
That what we have is never there when we turn the page
So go ahead, go and lie to me with every word
There’s no need to decipher what can clearly be heard
But you don’t mind, you tell yourself it’s only method acting
So now we’re splitting, yes we’re splitting at the seams
And trying to make it look natural, like an actor changing scenes.
It all happens so suddenly and it’s so hard to believe
That what was centre stage is now buried in the wings.
And we’re all terrible actors, but my god it’s a beautiful stage.
It seems like such a pity, it seems like such a shame,
To be toeing the line, to be putting these scenes to shame
And to spit upon the floor where there once was so much grace.
So go ahead, go and fuck everybody you know
It doesn’t matter to me, but don’t you think that it’s so strange
That what we have, is never there when you turn the page.
So go ahead, go and fuck everything that you see
It doesn’t matter who’s hurt, just as long as you’re pleased now
And that you know, you’ll only ever get scraps when you dig this low.
So go ahead, go and break yourself upon the ground
There’s always someone dumb enough to want to stick around now
But you don’t mind, you tell yourself it’s only method acting.
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5. |
An Ending
05:27
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Under the bare bulb of dawn, I was forlorn
Waiting for an ending to come
And your demeanour said it wouldn’t be long
You herald the old ghosts that I saw
Circling round your kitchen, marching up to deaths front door
To tell me, there could have been more
Now even the shallowest of wounds are weeping
My fragile family tree can’t take another beating, oh boy
Don’t tell me that there could have been more
And out in the distance, I was sure
That all of our misgivings would falter and fall to the floor
Under these illusions no more
But here I am, holding your candle, with everyone you’ve ever loved
And no one’s going to blow it out
Straight down the path on to dismay
Walking oh so slowly, holding your hand all the way
Tears you thought you’d never replace
And all of the reasons that we make
Scarcely give me solace, just let me see the mark death made
Everything in its right place
But here I am, holding your candle, with everyone you’ve ever loved
And no one’s going to blow it out.
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Vanderlay IDF, France
Vanderlay is the moniker of Melbourne born, folk singer songwriter Caspar Conrick.
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